Internet Dating for Married People
Um, okay, we got drunk and perused the listings on craigslist with a friend who is not married. She thought it might be fun to find someone who could be interesting and attentive and worthwhile. We thought it would be good for her to snag a man with all those qualities, and maybe more. She was drunk the first time she looked, and she only found one posting that seemed moderate. I never saw the posting, so I can't elaborate. But I am told it was free of photos of genitalia. That alone set the man apart and above all other offerings.
After some correspondence, our friend gained access to additional information. The correspondent offered pictures of himself in drag and a link to his personal website. Although I'm tempted to link here, I won't, because I just can't out people like that. Although I could. But I won't. Maybe later. And only if my friend says it's okay. And I think she will because their brief internet conversation has ended as of today.
Regarding the website: I uttered three words upon my initial introduction to it. Hmm. Wow. Really? I didn't use any enthusiastic punctuation in my speech either. Here was a man who knew how to tuck and roll. I wondered if this explained the absence of penis pictures. Maybe it was stuck way up high in the crack, inaccessible after too many bouts of binding.
There were other pictures too. Other women all dressed up like they were in drag too. Nothing natural or beautiful, to my aesthetic. It all looked like super-goth glamorama at burning man to me.
I suppose we all have our interests, idiosyncracies, reasons for existence. I told my friend, "well, it could be fun to hang with him." And I meant it. He was a heterosexual man with a few self-proclaimed talents that not everyone can own. He can apply false lashes, slide on fishnets without ripping them, and pose unabashedly spread eagle on linoleum floors for his own camera. I admit that I can't do any of that.
As it turned out, he was kind of funny. But it all petered out in the end. He started to talk about the color of his pubic hair, without invitation. When my friend decided to ditch him, he wrote back: "I am obviously decent; otherwise, why would all those naked women pose for me?" She didn't write back.
After some correspondence, our friend gained access to additional information. The correspondent offered pictures of himself in drag and a link to his personal website. Although I'm tempted to link here, I won't, because I just can't out people like that. Although I could. But I won't. Maybe later. And only if my friend says it's okay. And I think she will because their brief internet conversation has ended as of today.
Regarding the website: I uttered three words upon my initial introduction to it. Hmm. Wow. Really? I didn't use any enthusiastic punctuation in my speech either. Here was a man who knew how to tuck and roll. I wondered if this explained the absence of penis pictures. Maybe it was stuck way up high in the crack, inaccessible after too many bouts of binding.
There were other pictures too. Other women all dressed up like they were in drag too. Nothing natural or beautiful, to my aesthetic. It all looked like super-goth glamorama at burning man to me.
I suppose we all have our interests, idiosyncracies, reasons for existence. I told my friend, "well, it could be fun to hang with him." And I meant it. He was a heterosexual man with a few self-proclaimed talents that not everyone can own. He can apply false lashes, slide on fishnets without ripping them, and pose unabashedly spread eagle on linoleum floors for his own camera. I admit that I can't do any of that.
As it turned out, he was kind of funny. But it all petered out in the end. He started to talk about the color of his pubic hair, without invitation. When my friend decided to ditch him, he wrote back: "I am obviously decent; otherwise, why would all those naked women pose for me?" She didn't write back.
posted by your friend at Thursday, November 30, 2006
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